Very successful people know how to not get upset & can remain calm under the worst situations. What can a person who is clueless about this do to learn how to be this way. Any techniques, books, wisdom? Ideas are all welcome.

It helps me to know it is temporary.  I can do anything temporarily.  And no matter how bad it is; it is temporary.  It also helps to have a plan.  I was a Paramedic for 13 years.  Everyone asked me how I could stay so calm.  Well it was because I had been trained what to do, so when a situation arose I just went down the ol checklist in my mind.  So it helps to have a plan. First you prioritize, then go from most urgent/important to least urgent/important.  I just put off freaking out until later.  Many times I came home kicked off my shoes got a cold Dr.Pepper and cried.  But I never freaked until the situation had passed.  But really as long as I was going through the to do list I was ok.  If its really bad distract yourself.  The most stressed is always the passenger never the driver.  Because as long as you are doing something, you can feel in control. So if you can do something do it, if it is out of your hands distract yourself.  And the last thing is like the beatles said,"Let it be" if it is something like a  discussion on politics or religion with a difficult person.  Just let yourself have a difference of opinion. Agree to disagree.  You may be right and they may be wrong, but you may just have to be ok with leaving them on the dark side until they are ready to hear it.  Letting your blood boil will not help them understand any quicker.  From your question we all know 3 things about you.  You are a person that cares, and is passionate and compassionate and you welcome all ideas.  To me a person with those traits cannot go wrong.

1. Prepare for time out if the stressful situation is drawn-out. If it's tax season and you're a tax accountant, build in regular breaks during each day and take a day off once in a while when you are away from your cell phone, computer, email, etc. Use the breaks to refresh your mind and body and recharge. Power nap, take a brisk walk, go fishing, run, fly a kite, watch a favorite movie, read a poem!



2. If it's a stressful meeting with someone, agree upfront to work for a period of time, then take a break, and then work again, and then take a break. During the breaks, make sure you do something to relieve whatever stress has built up in your body. Do 6 slow, deep cleansing breaths. Drink a tall glass of water in slow, measured sips and really taste the water, erasing all other thoughts and worries from your mind. Then you can re-enter the meeting in a calmer frame of mind.

Try some yoga. Most people think its just another workout session, but actually your mostly just stretching and you work on your breathing and consentration, to just let go of everything and be very calm.  Alot of the postures that you hold will increase the level of seratonin in the brain which helps you to be happier, and it also increases your ability to BECOME calm in stressful situations even if you can't do yoga at that time. It really is a peaceful lifestyle.

First of all one can only be who they are



But the Rule would be to always Listen , Think , and consider before one speaks .



And think of this One Thing , If confronted with a situation and or a person , you know maybe stressful or argumentative ,

How Would you want the situation to be handle , or the person to address you ?

Then do it that way !!!!



Treat everyone as YOU would want to be treated

and handle the situation the way , it is best and the less stressful !!!



But do all things through understanding and wisdom

Honestly, I find humor to help a lot. When I'm stressed or blue, I'll watch a funny movie or head over to youtube and hunt up some funny vids. It always puts me in a better mood and I feel more relaxed. In stressful situations, I'll always crack a joke. I try to see the humor in everything. If I didn't, I'd probaby be wearing a pretty white coat with no sleeves and live in a padded room, with some giant orderly named Bubba injectng me with anti-psychotics. LOL

Lots of books out there. You have to learn to let go. Let things be that you can do nothing about. Check out a website that helped me understand that I have to like me first.